The Rules Of Coition
And when marriage is mentioned, the question of physical nearness to the woman will certainly arise and the condition of the woman has to be considered vis-a-vis coition with a menstruating woman. Allah-SWT Commands His-SWT Prophet-SW to let the Muslims know that menstruation is an impurity and copulation with women is forbidden until they are cleansed; and that copulation is permitted only the way Allah-SWT has enjoined, i.e. in the vulva. It must be remembered that Allah-SWT loves those who repent and beg for forgiveness i.e. if someone overwhelmed by his sexual drive commits the sin of copulating during his wife's menses, he must beg for Allah-SWT’s Forgiveness, and pay alms to the poor if possible, as it is the best form of atonement. Allah-SWT loves those who keep themselves clean, who abstain from all that is forbidden and strive in His-SWT obedience.
Wives are the tillage for husbands and the primary goal of conjugal act is begetting children for the preservation of human race rather than carnal indulgence. So a man may enter his tilth in any way he wants and may adopt any posture in doing so but must remember that the entry is permitted only wherein the seed is sown for the offspring and not anywhere else. Moreover the sperm does not penetrate when a woman is menstruating and it is pollution. Nor does any filthy, unnatural practice fulfil the aim of procreation. The aim is not to indulge in carnal pleasures but to reform the society without losing sight of moral and spiritual ends for the eternal bliss.
Fear Allah-SWT under all circumstances. Men must not think that by marriage they have taken possession of a woman merely to seek reckless pleasure. The women have their rights over men, being human beings. It is very important to observe the limits set by Allah-SWT even during a sexual act. It must be remembered that everyone has to stand before Allah-SWT for Reckoning. O Prophet-SW! Give glad tidings to those believing in the Greatness of Allah-SWT , who do not allow their emotions to violate the limits set by Him-SWT , and convey to them the promise of Divine rewards.
The Name of Allah-SWT and an oath in His-SWT Name should not be made a barrier in the embellishment of social life, lest one should say that he would have certainly done a certain good deed had he not sworn upon Allah-SWT in anger or in annoyance not to do it. If the action is noble, or it is a matter of mutual reconciliation amongst people, it must be done. Allah-SWT knows and is Witness to everything. Beware of your words and ensure that your mind and heart are unpolluted. Think virtuously, speak graciously and act righteously.
Never Swear On A Sin
If you have lied inadvertently or have sworn upon a lie mistaking it to be a truth, it is His-SWT Grace and Mercy to condone and not punish you. But for maters, in which you are determined to prove falsehood as truth on oath, knowing it to be so, Allah-SWT will take you to task, although He-SWT may grant some respite. Never take liberty with His-SWT Clemency, when He-SWT grips, He-SWT grips hard. Similarly if a man swears that he will not go to his wife, he has a period of four months. If they re-unite during this period it is fine but if they decide to separate, Allah-SWT is all Hearing, all Knowing. This situation is called Aila’, having four options. Firstly, a man does not fix any period and swears that he will not seek her; secondly he fixes a period of four months; thirdly a period of more than four months is fixed and lastly a period of less than four months is fixed. In the first three situations if he breaks his oath before the lapse of four months and goes unto his wife, he must expiate for his oath and his marriage remains valid. But if the four months have passed, the divorce has taken place; he cannot revert to his wife without a renewal of marriage contract. In the last situation if he breaks his oath, he will expiate, but if he does not, even then the marriage remains valid, as the period is less than four months (Bayan al Quran).
If the divorce has taken place, a woman must wait for three menstrual periods i.e., a woman whose marriage is consummated, and she has periods, and is free, not a bondswoman. If in such a woman is divorced, she cannot remarry before the lapse of three periods. It does not behove a believing woman to conceal her pregnancy or her menstruation. And if the divorce is revocable, which will be discussed later, the husband has the right to have her back without the renewal of marriage contract, provided that his intention is of reformation and not persecution, though reunion will still be valid. Just as men enjoy right over women so do the women have rights over men. Yes, men do have a degree of superiority over them, as by virtue of her physical structure a woman finds security under male protection. And the real Sovereignty belongs to Allah-SWT , before Whom both men and women are accountable. It is He-SWT Who created this system, with wisdom.
Woman And Islam
Society originates from a man and a woman, spreading out into families, tribes and nations. To beautify the social system, Islam works on the reformation of its very foundation, by establishing the status of each sex vis-a-vis their rights and responsibilities. Equality in Islam is that situation whereby everyone carries out his duties and gets due rights. As for the Akhirah, the deciding factor shall be Taqwa. There shall be surely such women who would excel over millions of men in Akhirah.
Before Islam, a woman was taken as an item of household use. She was traded, and also passed on to the heirs of her master as part of the legacy. The Europeans were not even prepared to accept her as a human being, while in India; she was burnt alive on her husband’s pyre. In 586 A.D. it was decided in France after great hesitation that though woman was also human, but her only purpose was to serve man and be his handmaid. Today, in stark contrast to those times, no pain is spared to establish her rule over men! Movements of inequality are run in the name of equality, giving unbridled freedom to women and pushing the whole society towards destruction.
It is only Islam that got the glory of woman acknowledged as a mother, wife, sister, and a daughter. Together with her duties, her rights were first spelled out, giving her a vital role in the building up of the society. She was made a shareholder in the inheritance and given the right to reject an offer of marriage on reaching the age of puberty. If she does not accept it, the marriage will be invalid. Similarly, upon being divorced or widowed, she retains her freedom and cannot be forced into marriage. Besides, spending on the wife by the husband is declared as worship. If the husband does not fulfil his obligations towards her, she has the right to go to the court to compel the husband to either fulfil her rights, or else to divorce her.
Given these rights, she too has not been allowed freelancing but has been kept under the protection of man. To build up the family and upbringing her children, a gigantic task by itself, she has been spared the pangs of earning a livelihood and in the process becoming an item of entertainment for men. Such an exposure amounts to transgression on her rights and does not only lead to her depredation but to the destruction of the entire society.
Allah-SWT has determined the rights of everyone and has commanded to execute them in a decent manner. By granting superiority to man He-SWT has alluded to the fact that a woman is weaker than a man and where she errs, it is the responsibility of man to overlook and find a way of amity. In fact all troubles stem from the fact that people demand their rights without discharging their duties. The beauty of a social system lies in the positive attitude of an individual whereby he fulfils his duties diligently towards others and demands his rights with grace and tolerance. This principle is effective from an individual to a government and is a sure guarantee of peace and tranquillity.